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Saturday, 21 September, 2019
Last Update 16:38
02:34    |    28/10/2009

There is no room for two people with superiority complex in a couple

The difficulty to become part of  a group,  to be tolerant and to make compromises to maintain long term relationships are the main features  betraying a personality with superiority complex. Parents who overestimate the qualities of their child and ban him or her to have relations with children they consider inferior contribute to the shape up of the superiority complex.  When they become grown ups, people who suffer from this complex manage to stay in friendship relationships only with those that accept their leader attitude. The relationship of a couple including two partners, both with superiority complex looks like a battle field in which imposing oneself and one’s will become more important than the feelings and the harmony,  psychotherapist Cristian Andrei tells Bucharest Herald.

BH: When does this complex begin to gain shape and what is the family’s role in feeding it?


Dr. Cristian Andrei: When a child acquires a superiority complex he is already included in a social life form (kindergarten, school). The family, (those people to whom he tends to turn in difficult moments) have an elitist education style, banning the child to play with anyone and telling him or her about his or her qualities, his or her favored faith etc.

BH: Is there a connection between the superiority and the inferiority complex?


Dr. Cristian Andrei:
Sometimes the superiority complex can be acquired by excessive improvement of the inferiority complex. If a person has a superiority complex and is irrevocably sanctioned by important people for him or for her, an inferiority complex might occur, sometimes following neurosis.

BH: What chances do the people who suffer from superiority complex have, to get integrated in a group and what type of friends do they usually chose?

Dr. Cristian Andrei: L
ong term relationships are difficult to access for a person with superiority complex. They are possible if the others acknowledge the various qualities of the person in case, offer him or her the right place in the group and do not contest his or her personality.

BH:  How do these people behave in a couple and what type of complexes do they create to their children?

Dr. Cristian Andrei: Any couple relationship (either is erotic, friendship, mother- son etc) works if the partner of the person with the superiority complex takes the complementary, submissive role. There is no room for two people with a superiority complex in a couple. Most of the times, children with parents suffering from a superiority complex, end up suffering from an inferiority complex.

BH: What manages to intimidate these people? What do they feel threatened by?


Dr. Cristian Andrei: The essence of the superiority complex is the impossibility to descend to levels inferior to the conception one has about oneself. People who have this complex cannot accept compromises: they do not walk, do not do physical work, cannot conceive humiliation, do not show compassion, do not live in the countryside.

Institutul de Relatii Umane (Human Relations Institute)
Address: Str Av Petre Cretu, nr 49, sector 1, Bucuresti
Tel: 0726 678 940; 021 224 22 1
E-mail:
This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it


Dr. Cristian Andrei: Intr-un cuplu nu este loc pentru doua persoane cu complex de superioritate


Dificultatea de a se integra intr-un grup, de a fi tolerant si de a face compromisuri pentru a mentine relatii pe termen lung sunt principalele trasaturi care tradeaza o personalitate dominata de un complex de superioritate. Parintii care supraevalueaza calitatile copilului si ii interzic legaturile cu copii pe care ii considera inferiori lui contribuie la formarea complexului de superioritate. La maturitate, oamenii care sufera de acest complex  reusesc sa ramana in relatii de prietenie numai cu cei care le accepta atitudinea de lider. Relatia unui cuplu format din parteneri care au ambii complex de superioritate seamana cu un camp de lupta in care  impunerea personalitatii si a vointei proprii devin mai importante decat sentimentele si armonia, a declarat pentru Bucharest Herald psihoterapeutul Cristian Andrei.


BH: La ce varsta incepe sa se formeze acest complex si care este rolul familiei in alimentarea lui?

Dr. Cristian Andrei: Cand un copil dobandeste un complex de superioritate, el este deja cuprins intr-o forma de viata sociala formala (gradinita, scoala). Familia, respectiv persoanele de atasament primar (adica acele persoane la care tinde sa se intoarca in momente dificile) au un stil elitist in educatie, interzicand copilului sa se joace cu oricine si vorbindu-i despre calitatile lui, destinul lui favorabil etc.

BH: Exista o legatura intre complexul de superioritate si cel de inferioritate?

Dr. Cristian Andrei: Uneori complexul de superioritate poate fi dobandit prin supracompensare, adica prin ameliorarea in exces a complexului de inferioritate. In cazul in care o persoana manifesta complexe de superioritate si este sanctionata irevocabil de persoane importante pentru ea, se poate ivi un complex de inferioritate, de obicei in urma unei nevroze.
 
BH: Ce sanse au persoanele care sufera de complexul de superioritate sa se integreze intr-un mediu si ce gen de prieteni isi aleg de obicei?


Dr. Cristian Andrei: Relatiile durabile sunt greu accesibile unei persoane cu complex de superioritate; ele sunt posibile in masura in care ceilalti recunosc diferitele calitati ale celui in cauza, ii ofera locul potrivit in grup si nu ii contesta personalitatea.

BH: Cum se comporta aceste persoane in cuplu si ce gen de complexe le creaza copiilor lor?

Dr. Cristian Andrei: Orice relatie de cuplu (fie el erotic, de prietenie, de filiatie etc) este functionala daca partenerul celui cu complex de superioritate isi asuma rolul complementar, submisiv. Intr-un cuplu nu e loc pentru doua persoane cu complex de superioritate. De cele mai multe ori copiii cu parinte care are complex de superioritate sunt marcati de complexe de inferioritate.

BH: Ce resuseste sa ii intimideze pe acesti oameni? De ce se simt amenintati?

Dr. Cristian Andrei: Esenta complexului de superioritate este imposibilitatea de a te cobora la niveluri inferioare conceptiei pe care o ai despre tine. Oamenii care sufera de acest complex nu pot accepta compromisuri: nu merg pe jos, nu muncesc fizic, nu concep umilinta, nu au compasiune manifesta, nu locuiesc la tara.

Institutul de Relatii Umane
Adresa: Str Av Petre Cretu, nr 49, sector 1, BucurestiTel: 0726 678 940; 021 224 22 1
E-mail
: This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it

 
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